My First Blog

by Red Wolf

Gwen smiled as she got in her car. It was just after 5:00 and she stood a chance of having a good, long soak in the tub before Rhys got home.

Glancing out the window, Gwen noticed that the overcast made it seem later than it was. Even the lack of traffic was odd.

With a start, Gwen slammed her foot on the brake and pulled over. She'd caught herself nodding off.

"Could you drive me home, Jack? I'm falling asleep at the wheel." The rain on the windscreen was hypnotic. "What do you mean it's 5:00am?"

Torchwood 100 — challenge #19: equinox

Published Babble Horde — 28.03.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 28.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

"What's up?" Andrew had been surprised to find Xander hiding in his office instead of at the Council meeting, leering at the representative from Edinburgh.

"Giles asked me to chauffeur Mr Hunt from Manchester. He spent the entire trip calling me names I didn't understand and threatening to hurt me in creative ways." Xander wasn't sure he wanted to know what a nonce was.

Andrew shook his head. "Gene's talent for violence is one of the reason Giles invited him. I take it you'll be taking him home." Xander shuddered. "Ask him about spaghetti westerns, he's a Sergio Leone nut."

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #209: message / messenger
beer_good_foamy — challenge: gene hunt

Published Babble Horde — 26.03.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 26.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

Following in the team's footsteps, Gwen nodded her apologies but was careful not to make eye contact. As Jack dealt with recalcitrant military personnel, Gwen watched her former colleagues.

The bowed heads and pointed glances of a pair of uniformed officers gossiping over her sudden rise into the lofty arena beyond police work. The young, pale-faced constable who'd discovered the body was sobbing into his hands and trying not to throw up again.

It was the sight of the familiar that made her thankful that a chance encounter and a curious nature had taken her away from it all.

Torchwood 100 — challenge #18: alternate universes

Published Babble Horde — 21.03.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 21.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

"You remember that lecture about size being relative?"

The Doctor glanced across at Rose as they trimmed the sails.

"When I asked you to prove it, I didn't mean that we should head to the first planet where we'd being scooped up as novelty toys to compete in a yacht race on a pond so big I can't see the other side." Rose winced as their craft nearly collided with a boat manned by creatures with more arms than an octopus.

"Fortunately, they'll lose interest in us when the race is over. On Myphous Prime, they toast the winners, literally."

Doctor Who 100 — challenge #155: lost at sea

Published Babble Horde — 19.03.2006
Published Doctor Who 100 — 19.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

"Dawn says we owe her big time for making her drop everything to find out that a demon gardener is about to wreak havoc in London." Andrew passed the report to Xander.

"She's kidding, right?"

Andrew snorted. "About us owing her? Dawn never forgets a favour. You should know that."

"No." Xander shook his head. "A gardener?"

"Well, there was mention of topiary and selective pruning."

"But no direct mention of plants."

"Great. Something's about to go all Sweeney Todd on the populace?"

Xander blinked in surprise and picked up the phone to see if Dawn could translate Andrew's outburst.

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #208: green

Published Babble Horde — 19.03.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 19.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

Gwen had always hated when CID swanned in and took over a case after uniform had done all the hard work. She was always apologetic when Torchwood pulled rank on local police cases.

However, there were times when Torchwood's disregard for other services had its upside.

DI Cynthia Ferguson from London had a long history of alienating the local Police with her attitude of superiority and incompetence.

Seeing Jack point out the flaws in Ferguson's investigation had been awe-inspiring. Her old colleagues were equally impressed, when a video of the incident had mysteriously found its way into their hands.

Torchwood 100 — challenge #17: lazy mod week

Published Babble Horde — 16.03.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 16.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

Dawn put the phone down and smiled to herself. She had secured Wolf for the entire weekend, had a definite slot for Ceallach and had bribed Rachel into letting her borrow Declán.

"What are you up to, love?"

"You remember that horrid little man who refused to pay his account even after we returned his infestation of Noord demons? I've arranged to have a financial meeting with him."

"As much as I'd like to see this matter sorted, I have a suspicion that setting your private pack of werebeasts loose on a civilian would be frowned upon by the law."

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #207: title swap: the pack

Published Babble Horde — 12.03.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 12.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

The Doctor was deep in thought, a half formulated theorem for energy manipulation had mutated into the opening lines of an operetta. His reverie was interrupted by a rain of small plastic objects made up of cats, nuns, a bride and groom and cows.

Looking up he saw Jack and Rose standing in the doorway, each armed with a pair of small catapults that were pointed in his direction.

"Run," Jack yelled and they took off down the corridor.

Perhaps stopping by that monster sale of toys and novelties on Treyiois may not have been such a good idea.

Doctor Who 100 — challenge #152: monster
Doctor Who 100 — challenge #153: cats and dogs
Doctor Who 100 — challenge #154: marriage

Published Babble Horde — 09.03.2006
Published Doctor Who 100 — 09.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

Gwen studied the crime reports for Cardiff. There was something niggling at her, but it was just out of reach.

"Tosh, could you print me out another report? I need Sundays between these times." She scribbled the details, watching as the results scrolled down the monitor. "Look at that."

"I can't even pronounce that name correctly."

"It's not just the streets, it's family names and businesses." Gwen had found a rash of petty crimes occurring during morning services where the targets had the names of saints in common."

"The local police won't be pleased to hear they missed that connection."

Torchwood 100 — challenge #16: welsh saints

Published Babble Horde — 08.03.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 08.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

Walking out of his office, Jack looked over the Hub, to see Tosh and Gwen at their workstations, heads down and studiously ignoring the racket from the recreation room. The girls' indifference to the noise and the packaging material strewn across the floor didn't bode well.

Returning to his desk, Jack called up the CCTV to see Owen, samurai sword glinting in the subdued light, as he stalked across the room to assault the pinball machine.

Jack could foresee another argument over using alien technology to carry swords in public. Owen had a Highlander fetish that went way beyond tragic.

Torchwood 100 — challenge #15: crossovers: highlander

Published Babble Horde — 07.03.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 07.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

"It was purple." Gwen traced a condensation circle with her finger. "I like purple."

Tosh shook her head violently, then froze to let the room catch up. "It was green and had a little umbrella." She smiled gratefully as Ianto handed her a coffee, it would be another fifteen minutes before it sunk in that he hadn't been wearing trousers.

"I was hit by a bus." Owen groaned theatrically before passing out.

Jack surveyed his miserable-looking crew. "You're all a bunch of lightweights." He doubted they'd ask him to mix them drinks from his private stash any time soon.

Torchwood 100 — challenge #14: the last thing i remember

Published Babble Horde — 06.03.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 06.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

"Somehow I don't see plastic sippy cups as something that would make a positive impact on clients." Spike shuddered and drank from a mug the colour of toxic waste.

Dawn glared at Spike over the rim of a bright orange plastic mug. "You can blame Andrew and Xander's display of inept juggling last night for the new cups." She still couldn't believe the garish plastic replacements the boys had sent in apology. Somewhere there were happy meals missing their toys.

"The real stuff is safely under lock and key." She jingled a key. "You just have to sniff them out."

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #204: china / chinese
Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #205: scout
Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #206: absence

Published Babble Horde — 05.03.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 05.03.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

"The infestation by the cathedral turned out to be a bunch of role playing geeks." Spike tossed the file on Dawn's desk and froze as something bounced off his forehead. "Hey! A cow? Who throws a cow?"

"Andrew left them here." Dawn waved a toy gun. "Aren't they great." She shot another cow at Rachel, who retaliated with a volley of her own.

"Right, I'm out of here until you two stop acting like escapees from St Trinian's." Spike paused with his hand on the doorknob. "Although, I could wait for you to dress like schoolgirls. Ow! Watch the eyes!"

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #203: saints

Published Babble Horde — 12.02.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 12.02.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

Ianto called up the local CCTV footage. "You may want to see this." His mouth quirked in a smile, as Owen swore and took off at a run.

"What was that all about?" Toshiko picked up the papers that Owen's rushed departure had disturbed.

"Owen's car's getting clamped again."

Toshiko grinned. "He won't be pleased, they damaged the paint work last time."

Gwen watched the monitor, giggling at the pantomime of Owen trying to weasel out of a clamping. "It's his own fault for trying to chat up DCI Swanson. There's a reason he's not supposed to answer the phones."

Torchwood 100 — challenge #13: kathy swanson

Published Babble Horde — 10.02.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 10.02.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

Jack dropped everything when he heard the scream, but was unprepared for the sight of a struggling Rose dangling from a library ladder.

"Stop laughing and help." Her snagged shirt pulled tighter under her armpits. "Great. Now, I'm half naked."

"You dragged me out of bed, so I'm all naked, but you don't see me complaining. Lift your arms and try wriggling free."

Twisting out of her clothing, Rose dropped safely into Jack's waiting arms. "Hello."

"Hello."

The Doctor stood at the door with his arms folded. "Is this a private party?"

Rose held out a hand. "Not any more."

Doctor Who 100 — challenge #151: filth

Published Babble Horde — 09.02.2006
Published Doctor Who 100 — 09.02.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

Jack stood at the edge of the roof, his coat billowing out behind him like great dark wings, as he surveyed the city. Gwen leaned against the stairwell with her arms wrapped around her knees.

"Will it always be like this?" Gwen whispered.

"Scraping through by the skin of our teeth? Struggling to save an ungrateful and unknowing city? I'm sure that was in the fine print of your employment contract."

"I know about the psychic paper, Jack."

"Ah." He turned, pulling Gwen to her feet and into his arms. "We do the best we can and hope it's enough."

Torchwood 100 — challenge #12: shadows

Published Babble Horde — 06.02.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 06.02.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

Andrew hit the remote to start their planned Babylon 5 marathon. The menu screen had just appeared when he froze the DVD. "What the hell is that?"

Xander blinked in bafflement at the unexpected derailing of his thoughts and it took a moment before he realised that Andrew was talking about the object on their coffee table.

"The girls got it for me when they graduated, but I think they got a bit confused with their terminology and thought I liked little plastic men."

"They got you a bowl made from melted army men? An interesting misconception, but oddly endearing."

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #202: super or bowl or super bowl

Published Babble Horde — 05.02.2007
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 05.02.2007
Published Forever Fandom — 08.09.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 08.09.2007

by Red Wolf

A trip to 17th century Kyoto found Rose in 21st century Tokyo. She was never sure if these detours were down to dodgy piloting or retaliation by the TARDIS after one encouraging thump with a mallet too many.

Frowning as she read a poster on the platform, Rose turned to the Doctor. "What's a Shinkansen and why does it eat people? Is this a Godzilla thing?"

"It's the bullet train. It's a warning to stay away from the edge of the platform."

"Couldn't they just say to mind the gap?" The train flashed past on an adjacent platform. "Never mind."

Doctor Who 100 — challenge #150: speeding bullet

Published Babble Horde — 30.01.2006
Published Doctor Who 100 — 30.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Andrew found Xander in the hall. "I know it's a wacky concept, but aren't teachers supposed to be in the classroom with their students?"

Xander winced as a solid thump reverberated through the wall. "I'm giving them some leeway."

There was a deathly silence from the room. "I think they just ran with it."

Locking the door, Xander flashed a grin at Andrew.

There was a small explosion, the hiss of water and the screams of unexpectedly drenched Slayers.

"Oops, I forgot to mention that I fixed their careful circumvention of the sprinkler system."

"Nice work. Fancy an early lunch?"

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #201: mea culpa

Published Babble Horde — 29.01.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 29.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Gwen held her breath, afraid her hammering heart would give her away. As the sound of footsteps faded, she risked a glance around the corner and watched the retreating backs of her pursuers in the dim light. She nearly screamed at the whisper in her ear.

"If you weren't on my team, I'd have had you."

"Jack!" Gwen slumped against his chest in relief. "You scared the life out of me."

"Watch my back." Jack waved his gun.

Gwen pulled herself together and followed in his wake. Paintball games in the Hub were going to be the death of her.

Torchwood 100 — challenge #11: lazy mod week

Published Babble Horde — 28.01.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 28.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Rose had been surprised to discover that the Weekly World News was an almost universal constant. Wherever they went, there it was. Sure, it had a different masthead, but the content had the same lurid sensationalism that Rose was drawn to in much the same way as watching a car accident.

"Mildew communicates with untidy tenant?" she read aloud, eyebrows raised. "Isn't that one of those things your mother threatens you with when she finds the coffee cup you forgot about that has since turned into a science experiment?"

"Generally, yes. Unless you're on Betthio, then it's likely a relative."

Doctor Who 100 — challenge #148: urban legend and challenge #149: resistance

Published Babble Horde — 24.01.2006
Published Doctor Who 100 — 24.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Andrew found Xander staring at the walls of his office.

"You know that look the girls get when they're up to something? Not the one where they snicker and nudge each other when they're trying to prank you. It's more like when they're watching the clock in anticipation of something."

"Who have you got at the moment?" Andrew ran through Xander's class list. "Um, aren't these two chemistry geeks?"

"Yeah. So?"

"Why didn't you break them up? When you get more than one in a class they start competing." The dull explosion of a toilet echoed down the halls. "See?"

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #200: calculate

Published Babble Horde — 22.01.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 22.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Leaning against the wall with her arms crossed, Gwen watched as Jack fired at the target. When he put the gun down she removed her ear muffs.

"Nice grouping."

Jack shrugged as he inspected the weapon. "It's pulling a little to the left. But that's not why you're here, is it?"

"I've noticed that Ianto has started wearing a bowler hat and carrying an umbrella. It's a little eccentric, but seems to work with his suits, so I didn't think much of it. But I have to ask; why have you suddenly taken to wearing skin-tight, leather cat suits?"

Torchwood 100 — challenge #10: reverse fandom: avengers: dressed to kill

Published Babble Horde — 20.01.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 20.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Xander screamed as Andrew wrenched another piece of gunk from his leg.

"Stop carrying on like a big girl. It's your own fault for not listening when I told you to duck."

"I was catching up on my Spanish lessons." Xander nodded to the iPod that was still encased in the polymer binding his arm to his body. "I didn't expect to find your class catapulting goo across the gym."

"Look on the bright side, while your accidental test of the non-lethal restraint foam has highlighted some bugs we need to work out, it makes a great hair remover."

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #199: disobedience

Published Babble Horde — 15.01.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 15.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

"Sir, we have a problem."

Jack looked over Ianto's shoulder at Tosh's monitor to see panic on streets of Cardiff. "Any idea what they're running from?"

"There's nothing on the radio." Gwen looked up from where she was scanning the police channels.

Tosh toggled through cameras. "All the CCTV footage is the same. It's just people running."

Ianto tried the television channels. As the news crossed to a live report, the team clamped they hands over their ears.

Jack killed the sound. "Who hacked the city's emergency broadcast system? Cardiff does not need to hear the horror of Owen's singing."

Torchwood 100 — challenge #9: people photos

Published Babble Horde — 14.01.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 14.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Xander hit the ground when he heard the bang. After a quick check to make sure all body parts were where he'd left them, he looked around and spotted Andrew with a group of his trainees.

"What the hell are you doing? We don't do firearms training."

Andrew snorted and brandished a long PVC tube. "They're not guns, they're produce accelerators. We're comparing the projectile range of combustion and pneumatic launchers."

It took Xander a few moments of looking blank before his brain translated the geek into something approximating English. "You made potato cannons?"

"And next week we'll discuss trebuchets."

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #198: fire

Published Babble Horde — 09.01.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 09.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

As he rummaged through their weekly eBay purchases of purported alien artefacts, Owen let out a whoop and hefted a large metallic object onto his shoulder. "I always wanted a BFG."

Tosh and Gwen looked at him blankly. It wasn't an acronym they weren't familiar without outside of literature.

"Come off it. Big fucking gun? Surely you've heard the term before."

"Not everyone wasted their youth playing video games." Jack took the object from Owen and expertly ran his fingers over the controls, changing it's appearance considerably. "And it's not a weapon. It's the Telaxomi equivalent of a pooper scooper."

Torchwood 100 — challenge #8: roald dahl titles: the bfg

Published Babble Horde — 06.01.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 06.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Faith clicked her fingers, but Andrew still didn't respond.

"How long has he been like this, Giles?" Faith frowned as she waved a hand in front of Andrew's eyes.

Giles leaned forward and sighed. "One of the other Watchers found him like this, this morning."

"So, where was he last night?" Faith's tone hardened.

If Giles wasn't so concerned about Andrew, he'd have been amused by Faith's surprising protectiveness towards the lad. "As far as we've been able to determine, he was out on a buck's night."

Faith relaxed. "Well, that's the last remaining shreds of his heterosexuality destroyed then."

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #197: the night before

Published Babble Horde — 01.01.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 01.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

"It's not like—" Gwen started.

"We just we're trying—" Tosh interrupted before being stopped my Jack's upraised hand.

"I don't care what you were doing or why. The only reason I mention it is that you both seem to have missed the point; leaving Owen bound and gagged naked in the stationary cupboard is not something he sees as a punishment. It excites him."

Tosh looked at Gwen and giggled as she rolled her eyes.

"There are some things that Ianto draws the line at cleaning." Jack grinned as he handed the women a bucket and sponge. "Enjoy!"

Torchwood 100 — challenge #7: beginnings and endings

Published Babble Horde — 01.01.2006
Published Torchwood 100 — 01.01.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 12.06.2007
Published A Teaspoon and an Open Mind — 12.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 12.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Andrew had put his feet up on Dawn's desk and had been doing such a good impression of being asleep that he startled the girls when he finally spoke.

"What is it about this job that makes knives and swords seem a perfectly reasonable gift?"

"You have noticed what we do for a living, haven't you?" Dawn rolled her eyes.

"I would have thought that we'd try to escape work in our off time."

Rachel snorted, seeing where he'd been angling. "I keep telling you, you're too short for that rapier you've been eyeing. Have you considered getting a chisakatana?"

Jossverse Drabbles — challenge #196: holiday memories

Published Babble Horde — 27.12.2006
Published Jossverse Drabbles — 27.12.2006
Published Forever Fandom — 03.06.2007
Published fanfiction.net — 03.06.2007

by Red Wolf

Gwen nodded to the Detective Inspector before joining Jack. "It's not one of ours is it?"

"Not